


our own little world

by froggieyama



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Comfort, Comfort No Hurt, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cute Ending, Domestic Fluff, Fear of Germs, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, Kissing, Living Together, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mysophobia, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:09:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23421481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/froggieyama/pseuds/froggieyama
Summary: hinata's in love with sakusa. sakusa is beginning to love hinata.the only problem? sakusa is mysophobic. but if hinata gives him just a little bit of time, and a little bit of tlc, it'll be fine.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Sakusa Kiyoomi, Hinata Shouyou/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 22
Kudos: 354





	our own little world

Sakusa was not one to be okay with touch. He loathed it, loathed the accidental brushing of his hands against his teammates’, worse still the slaps on the back and the high fives.

Itachiyama had gotten used to him, or rather, he’d gotten used to Itachiyama. His teammates understood that he needed time and space and that it wasn’t their fault that he’d flinch every time they got close.    
  
Sakusa had gone the better part of 20 years without touching anyone, at least not anything that was meaningful. To avoid touch and crowds was just something that had become second nature to him.   
  
That was until Hinata burst into his life. A ball of sunshine that thrived off the crowds and the attention; incapable of keeping his hands to himself and quite possibly the most tactile person Sakusa had ever met.

He was also extremely cute. 

  
  


Hinata tried, for so long, to be as non-touchy as possible, but his efforts only reduced him to a level that Sakusa could just tolerate. But Hinata’s touch was different. He still hated it, sure, but it was slightly less painful than everyone elses. 

* * *

“Omi-chan!” Hinata grins, falling into line with Sakusa’s footsteps. His little legs, well-toned from volleyball, move much faster than they should just to keep up.    
“Yes, Hinata?”   
“Where are you going?”   
“Home… why?”

“Well there’s this movie that I really wanted to see and it’s come out so we can watch it at home and I was wondering, well, if you wanted to come watch it with me? I checked online and there’s no yucky stuff in it.”   
Sakusa’s heart warms, “well,” he feigns thinking about it, “as long as your house is clean.”   
Hinata’s smile is blinding as he explains the meticulous cleaning effort he underwent just the night before. How he took out the trash and scrubbed down all the benchtops and even mopped the floor. Sakusa wonders if his floors are as shiny as his smile. 

Sakusa often thinks about Hinata and his relationship, and knows that the only thing stopping them from dating is his mysophobia. Hinata is, unless he’s reading the situation entirely wrong, completely infatuated with him. He has so many other friends he could hang out with and buy presents for, and yet his attention seems to be solely on Sakusa. Every week or so, Hinata presents him with another trinket or keychain or snack that must cost enough to impact his bank account. Hinata has complained about how little money he has far too many times to count yet still can’t avoid buying Sakusa something every time it catches his eyes.    
  
It’s endearing, really. How he goes out of his way to make Sakusa comfortable, even though it’s probably far too much energy to be sustainable. 

Sakusa knows that Hinata’s a messy person naturally. He has a messy house and a messy fashion sense and a messy bag and even his phone screen is disorganised, apps without order as he can only guess where they are. It seems that every time Sakusa sees Hinata on his phone, the apps are in a different place.    
  
But he tries so hard to make Sakusa feel welcome in his life. As they step into Hinata’s small apartment, Sakusa is once again surprised by the sudden cleanliness of the house. Yesterday morning, when they were on a voice call, Sakusa could barely see the floor for all the clothes and other mess on it. Now, it looks like a brand new apartment all over again.    
  
“Clean enough?” Hinata asks, shy.

“Yes, thank you.”   
Hinata blushes a little, practically buzzing. Sakusa slips his shoes off and places them gently on the floor before stepping onto the freshly-cleaned wood. Hinata follows suit.    
  


* * *

  
  
The movie Hinata puts on is some Western comedy that surprisingly has no gross jokes that make Sakusa squirm. Half-way through, Hinata becomes antsy and restless, bouncing his legs almost violently. 

“Are you okay?” Sakusa asks.   
“Yes!” Hinata replies, way too quickly for it to be true.    
“Are you sure?”   
“Yes!... No… I dunno…”    
Sakusa draws his attention entirely to Hinata. “What’s wrong?”

Hinata looks way too reserved to be  _ Hinata _ , as Sakusa looks over to him.    
  
Hinata takes a moment to speak. “I think… I think I’m in love with you. But you obviously don’t reciprocate and it’s just…” This is the quietest Sakusa’s ever seen the other boy, legs pulling up to fit underneath his chin. If he wasn’t so damn terrified of it, he’d pull Hinata into a hug and never let go. 

Sakusa, once again, has been hit with the issue of being a blank state in all ways. He thinks Hinata’s cute, extremely cute, he might even say adorable, but doesn’t really know how to show it. No one can read his mind, and he’s not so good in the expressing feelings department. He doubts Hinata even fully understands the extent of his anxiety and touch starvation; he’s never told him. Never told him how sometimes, when someone accidentally bumps into him, he almost has a panic attack from the touch. Never told him that his hands hurt when he plays volleyball because he washes them far too much. Never told him that once he got a common cold and spent the whole time trying to claw out of his skin. He just wishes it wasn’t so hard.   
  
When he was younger, it was easy to stay isolated. Wearing a face mask all year round and purposefully avoiding other kids had them avoiding him too. That was probably for good reason; he didn’t grow up in the best neighbourhood and the kids in his classes were grotty and loud. And he loved his parents, still does, but was never normalised to their touch, never allowed himself to be. When he goes and visits his family in the school breaks, even his aging grandparents aren’t allowed to touch his face. At Itachiyama, he grew a reputation of being a freak, and never connected with anyone well enough to trust them to help him. To peel away the layers upon layers of fear that had consumed him and find the gentle boy that just needed people to take it slow.   
  
Sakusa was sick and tired of being like this. He just hoped Hinata could help him. 

“Hinata I…” Sakusa takes a shaky breath through his mask, “I like you too. It’s just that I stress so much about  _ touching _ you I can’t show it.”   
  
The world goes on outside. Sakusa doesn’t notice. 

One of Hinata’s hands, freshly washed with soap, reaches up towards his face. It stops an inch or so away from his skin, fingers curled to take his mask off.    
“Can I?” Hinata’s voice is softer than Sakusa’s ever heard it. He swallows and nods.    
Hinata’s fingers gently grab onto his mask, brushing against Sakusa’s ear. The fresh air on his face feels almost as if he’s naked, the blush on his cheeks and his nervous smile now visible for Hinata to see. 

Hinata’s calloused hand, the one not holding onto his mask, comes up to rest on Sakusa’s cheek. It feels so weird to feel someone touch his face; he barely even touches his own face. His brain is screaming about the germs and the diseases and he wishes it would just shut up.    
  
_ You’re safe _ , he tells himself,  _ you’re going to be okay. Hinata won’t hurt you. _

Eyes bore holes into him as he is once again at the other end of an intense, yet loving, stare. Hinata puts his mask down and gently places the other hand on Sakusa’s face, and the latter feels like crying. 

Fuck. He is crying. Tears come slowly, slipping onto Hinata’s hands. He has wanted to be held for so long that now that it’s happening it doesn’t feel  _ real _ . Hinata cries a little too, tears brimming in his eyes. 

  
Hinata holds him for what feels like forever, thumbing his cheekbones. The touch goes from a burning, painful sensation to something that makes him feel safe. Hinata’s hands are warm and, despite the callouses, soft.

“Can I kiss you?”    
“Could you… kiss my head first?”   
“Of course, Omi.” Hinata leans up, careful not to touch Sakusa anywhere but his face, and places a gentle kiss on Sakusa’s head. His lips are warm and not as wet as Sakusa would have expected them to be.

_ Oh _ .

  
“Please,” he murmurs, eyes reaching Hinata’s and staying there. He feels sick, but in a good way. Like the nerves before it’s his turn to serve. 

Hinata pulls his head down and rests their noses together. Sakusa stares into those gorgeous brown eyes before closing his own. Hinata’s breath is warm against his skin, and smells like toothpaste. He presses his lips, perfectly plump and warm, against Sakusa’s. 

  
Sakusa’s first-ever kiss is at age 22 in a tiny apartment that overlooks the city. It’s loving and it’s gentle and it shows him what he’s missed out on all these years. When Hinata pulls away, Sakusa closes the gap again.

* * *

A few months ago, touching Hinata was something Sakusa could only dream of. Now? It was something that was becoming more and more normal.

Hinata was becoming a permanent fixture in Sakusa’s life. After work, he comes through the door to Sakusa’s apartment, takes his shoes off, and immediately goes to shower. It’s become a well-welcomed habit, to not approach Sakusa after a long shift before he’s showered and done a skin-care routine and brushed his teeth. 

His boyfriends’ out-of-tune singing seeps through the thin wall that separates the apartment’s bathroom and the bedroom. It’s domestic and Sakusa loves it.    
  


After his shower, Hinata joins him, smelling of Sakusa’s body wash. He slips into bed, grabbing Sakusa’s hand with his own and sidling right up to him, close enough that they’re sharing body head but not too close that they’re touching, apart from their hands that are loosely linked together.    
  
He reaches up and places a kiss or two on Sakusa’s lips, the touch still electric after all this time.

“Can we cuddle?”   
Hinata’s eyes light up, “of course!”

Sakusa blushes, scooting a little closer so that Hinata’s head is almost against his chest. He wraps an arm, slowly, around Hinata’s waist, feeling the  _ warmth _ radiating off of his tiny boyfriend. His boyfriend gives out a soft hum of content and presses his forehead right up against Sakusa’s pounding heart. 

Later, when Hinata’s still except for his slow breaths, Sakusa cards a gentle hand through that soft, fluffy hair that has quickly become his favourite texture. The strands get caught on his fingers, and when he tugs, just slightly, Hinata sighs.   
“Kiyoomi…” he mumbles.

The world continues on outside as Sakusa presses a kiss to Hinata’s forehead, as if they are in their own tiny bubble. He whispers “I love you” into Hinata’s skin just once, but he feels like he should say it a million times more. 

The traffic on the road below becomes white noise as Sakusa falls asleep, content. 

**Author's Note:**

> hey everyone! i'm writing fics like a madman at the moment. next up is a bokuaka fic!!
> 
> please let me know if there's any ships you want to see!


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